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Ratings and Reviews (7 57 star ratings
7 reviews
)

Overall rating

4.4 out of 5
57
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  • 3 person found this review helpful

    3 people found this review helpful

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    Bible Belt Self Help, w/ a side order of shame.

    This review is from: No More Mr Nice Guy (Hardcover) Son of a preacher man, Glover describes the wallflower masculinity that pervades our day to day lives and its dreary outcomes. Certainly the pathological shame, and the essentially passive-aggressive, "not nice" nature of the self declared "Nice Guy" are spot on and worth reading. However 2/3 of the way through he reverts to a sort of staid Dr. Kellogg style puritanism, with quasi religious overtones, with clean living, pulling yourself up by your bootstraps self-help bromides and a life free of fantasy, indulgence or whatever mode of sexuality or thought he deems inappropriate*. Recovering nice guys who follow his program, such as it is, will find themselves out of self effacing, avoidant shame of being a Nice Guy and into a sort of "Promise Keepers" style cult, where any reflection of their individuality and masculity is the subject of it's own "Shame".; in a sort of a self help cycle of enthusiasm and disappointment. Almost comically shallow in substance and perspective, the "help" section of the book is nonetheless is treated as gospel by a small group of believers who congregate on the sponsored message board. As mentioned in other reviews, there you can witness them spend years struggling to become better "integrated men", while they try ever harder to apply what isn't working, and dismiss proven resources and approaches such as CBT and other resources in the Mens' Movement. Interested Readers would do better with "The Rational Male"- the problem, "Iron John"- manhood in society, and "Feeling Good - The New Mood Therapy", or even "The Passionate Marriage" note: Stylistically you may not enjoy the repetition, and you may or may not enjoy his quaint references to "acting out" or "peep shows"(pre internet?).One gets the impression that his regular practice involves many people with Substance abuse problems as he seems to conflate this with that.
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    Not what i had hoped.

    Great for people that put on a mask and need to be themselves. If your problem is that youre already being your true self and few people like it, you wont find help here.
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    Life changing. Literally.

    Finally. The book which makes sense of it all. I’m awful at finishing books, but this kept me gripped. It felt like reading a script delivered from god about where I’ve been going wrong in my life and how to fix it. Every page felt like a gift. Thank you.
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    make yourself great

    Describe yourself with such accuracy that makes you cry. when you recognize your faulty way in a bunch of cases, and see your way of thinking and dealing with problems, so clearly, you can change yourself and start to loving you and will become more happy.
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    Great book

    It is a great read, a great way to learn about my behaviour and patterns in life.
57

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