A year after arriving in France, Englishman Paul West is still struggling with some fundamental questions:_________________What is the best way to scare a gendarme?Why are there no health warnings on French nudist beaches?And is it really polite to sleep with your boss's mistress?In his second comedy of errors, Paul West opens an English tearoom, and ...

Was the Battle of Hastings a French victory?Non! William the Conqueror was Norman and hated the French.Were the Brits really responsible for the death of Joan of Arc?Non! The French sentenced her to death for wearing trousers.Was the guillotine a French invention?Non! It was invented in Yorkshire.Ten centuries' worth of French historical 'facts' bite the dust as Stephe...

Have you been taken to what you've been assured is the perfect house deep in the French countryside, only to find there's no electricity or running water? Gone to the doctor with a nasty cough, and been diagnosed with a rather more personal complaint? Walked into an half-empty restaurant, only to be told that it's complet?If the answer to any of the above is oui, Talk to the Snail is the book for you.Find out how to get served in a restaurant; th...

The chillingly accurate story of what happens when an unknown flu-like virus hits the Western world – published before Covid.It's all there – the masks, the lockdown, politicians in denial ... The only thing it didn't predict was that the virus would have the name of a Mexican beer.By the author of A Year in the Merde and 1000 Years of Annoying the French.A dark comedy narrated by the fatally naive Bernie Bridges, who dodges between a glamorous government minister, ...

Hayden Keyes knows everything there is to know about knights and the legends of King Arthur. But that doesn't mean he has ever jousted on horseback, worn a suit of armor, or flown on the back of a dimension-traveling griffin.In fact, Hayden's life is pretty ordinary. Well, perhaps ordinary is up for debate. Hayden never met his real parents, though his foster ones are great. Sure, they have a bit of a hoarding problem and an irrational fear of Halloween costumes, but nobody's life ...

The entertaining biography of Edward VII and his playboy lifestyle, by Stephen Clarke, author of 1000 Years of Annoying the French and A Year in the Merde.Despite fierce opposition from his mother, Queen Victoria, Edward VII was always passionately in love with France.He had affairs with the most famous Parisian actresses, courtesans and can-can dancers. He spoke French more elegantly than English. He was the first ever guest to climb the ...

An entertaining and eye-opening look at the French Revolution, by Stephen Clarke, author of 1000 Years of Annoying the French and A Year in the Merde.The French Revolution and What Went Wrong looks back at the French Revolution and how it’s surrounded in a myth. In 1789, almost no one in France wanted to oust the king, let alone guillotine him. But things quickly escalated until there was no turning back.The French Revolution and What Went Wro...

A NOTE FROM THE AUTHORBonjour cher reader,Ever since European history began, we Brits have been happily engaged in our national pastime - annoying the French. And the past couple of years have shown that this annoying never stops. To give just three examples:After a mid-Atlantic collision between French and British nuclear submarines, France's Minister of Defence seemed to blame the accident on ... shrimps.When French political supe...

THE POST-BREXIT EDITION - brand new chapters with extra EU chaos for Englishman Paul West.An Englishman, Paul West, goes to Brussels to work for a French MEP. There he gets an insider's view of what really goes on in the massive madhouse that is the EU Parliament. With the referendum on the horizon, things are even more hysterical than usual.When the Brexit result comes in, Paul has to make a decision. If he wants to work in Europe, should he apply for a Fr...

PARIS - one of the most visited cities in the world.BUT do you know ...Which is the most romantic spot to say 'je't'aime'? And the sexiest?Where to see fantastic art, away from all the crowds?Why Parisian men feel compelled to pee in the street?How to choose a hotel room where you might actually get a good night's sleep?Stephen Clarke goes behin...

Even the French acknowledge this English designer, Charles Worth (1825-95) as the founder of French haute couture. This new biography by the author of 1000 Years of Annoying the French tells for the first time the full story of Worth's often-underestimated wife Marie, who was his muse, chief saleswoman and the first-ever full-time fashion model.Writing with the help of the Worth family, Stephen Clarke is able to correct received wisdoms about Charle...

Even the French acknowledge this English designer, Charles Worth (1825-95) as the founder of French haute couture. This new biography by the author of 1000 Years of Annoying the French tells for the first time the full story of Worth's often-underestimated wife Marie, who was his muse, chief saleswoman and the first-ever full-time fashion model.Writing with the help of the Worth family, Stephen Clarke is able to correct received w...