This audiobook is narrated by a digital voice.The Tenth Door is more than a memoir. It is a spiritual roadmap, drawn not in ideology but in experience. Each chapter is a threshold. From the sweat-stained gi to the stillness of the cushion, from dream-symbols of eyes and coral to radiant exits and mantra initiations, Fred’s story bridges East and West, body and spirit, father and son. In the final pages, the reader is given two letters: one from Justin to Fred, and one from Fred to ...

Bloodier than Fried Green Tomatoes!Funnier than The Texas Chainsaw Massacre!Welcome to Gil's All Night Diner, where zombie attacks are a regular occurrence and you never know what might be lurking in the freezer. . .Duke and Earl are just passing through Rockwood county in their pick-up truck when they stop at the Diner for a quick bite to eat. They aren't planning to stick around-until Loretta, the eatery's owner, offers them $100 to take care of h...

'As you'd expect from Holt, Blonde Bombshell is rife with puns, complicated setups for ridiculous gags, and a riveting story that is completely implausible.' - Booklist'BLONDE BOMBSHELL is a clever, funny, tirelessly inventive, apocalyptic leg-hump of a book. Tom Holt may be the most imaginative satirist to land on our shores since Douglas Adams' - Christopher MooreA heart-warming tale of Armageddon from one of the funnies...

Constance Verity has been saving the world since she was seven, and she’s sick of it. She sets off on one last adventure to reset her destiny and become the one thing she’s never been: ordinary.Ever since she was granted a wish at birth by her fairy godmother, Constance Verity has become the world’s great adventurer. She is a master of martial arts, a keen detective, and possesses a collection of strange artifacts. Constance has spent the past twenty-eight years sa...

Maurice has just killed a dragon with a bread knife. And had his destiny foretold. . . and had his true love spirited away. That's precisely the sort of stuff that'd bring out the latent heroism in anyone. Unfortunately, Maurice is pretty sure he hasn't got any latent heroism.Meanwhile, a man wakes up in a jar in a different kind of pickle (figuratively speaking). He can't get out, of course, but neither can he remember his name, or what gravity is, or what those things on the ends...

Johannes Cabal, necromancer of some little infamy, returns in this riotously clever and terrifically twisted tale of murder and international intrigue.In this genre-twisting novel, infamous necromancer Johannes Cabal, after beating the Devil and being reunited with his soul, leads us on another raucous journey in a little-known corner of the world. This time he’s on the run from the local government.Stealing the identity of a minor bureaucrat, Cabal takes p...

The doughnut is a thing of beauty.A circle of fried doughy perfection.A source of comfort in trying times, perhaps.For Theo Bernstein, however, it is far, far more.Things have been going pretty badly for Theo Bernstein. An unfortunate accident at work has lost him his job (and his work involved a Very Very Large Hadron Collider, so he's unlikely to get it back). His wife has left him. And he doesn't have any money.Before Theo has time to fully apprec...

In San Francisco, the souls of the dead are mysteriously disappearing—and you know that can’t be good—in New York Times bestselling author Christopher Moore’s delightfully funny sequel to A Dirty Job. Read by Fisher Stevens.Something really strange is happening in the City by the Bay. People are dying, but their souls are not being collected. Someone—or something—is stealing them and no one knows where they are going, or why, but it has something ...

Johannes Cabal, a brilliant scientist and notorious snob, is single-mindedly obsessed in heart and soul with raising the dead. Well, perhaps not soul . . . He hastily sold his years ago in order to learn the laws of necromancy. But now, tormented by a dark secret, he travels to the fiery pits of Hell to retrieve it. Satan, who is incredibly bored these days, proposes a little wager: Johannes has one year to persuade one hundred people to sign over their souls or he will be damned ...

From David Wong, the writer of the cult sensation John Dies at the End comes another terrifying and hilarious tale of almost Armageddon at the hands of two hopeless heroes.Warning: You may have a huge, invisible spider living in your skull. THIS IS NOT A METAPHOR.You will dismiss this as ridiculous fear-mongering. Dismissing things as ridiculous fear-mongering is, in fact, the first symptom of parasitic spider infection -- the creature stimulates s...

New York Times bestselling author Christopher Moore channels William Shakespeare and Edgar Allan Poe in The Serpent of Venice, a satiric Venetian gothic that brings back the Pocket of Dog Snogging, the eponymous hero of Fool, along with his sidekick, Drool, and pet monkey, Jeff.Venice, a long time ago. Three prominent Venetians await their most loathsome and foul dinner guest, the erstwhile envoy of Britain and France, and widower of the murdered Queen Co...

For Constance Verity, saving the world isn’t the hard part. It’s keeping her new, ordinary life from falling apart along the way that’s going to be tricky. This is the next book in the witty Constance Verity trilogy, which Booklist named a Top 10 SF/Fantasy book of 2016.Constance successfully became an ordinary person. People warned her it would be boring—and they were right. That’s exactly why Connie loves it. But there’s...