"A hysterical look at the different aspects of sex for straights, gays, and even animals . . . The book offers amusing factoids sprinkled throughout." — SeattlePIWelcome to a Sexy World of Sexy Sex.Sex is the most powerful and important thing in the universe, and if you aren't instantly good at it you probably never will be and everyone will laugh at you. This is something you should know before even attempting sex.Fortunately, you ho...

NOW A NETFLIX ORIGINAL SERIESViolet, Klaus, and Sunny Baudelaire are intelligent children. They are charming, and resourceful, and have pleasant facial features. Unfortunately, they are exceptionally unlucky.In the first two books alone, the three youngsters encounter a greedy and repulsive villain, itchy clothing, a disastrous fire, a plot to steal their fortune, a lumpy bed, a deadly serpent, a large brass reading lamp, a long knife, and a terrible odour.In the tr...

NOW A NETFLIX ORIGINAL SERIESI hope, for your sake, that you have not chosen to read this book because you are in the mood for a pleasant experience. If this is the case, I advise you to put this book down instantaneously, because of all the books describing the unhappy lives of the Baudelaire orphans, The Miserable Mill might be the unhappiest yet. Violet, Klaus, and Sunny Baudelaire are sent to Paltryville to work in a lumber mill, and they find disaster and misfortune lurking be...

NOW A NETFLIX ORIGINAL SERIESAs the three Baudelaire orphans warily approach their new home Prufrock Preparatory School, they can't help but notice the enormous stone arch bearing the school's motto Memento Mori or "Remember you will die."This is not a cheerful greeting and certainly marks an inauspicious beginning to a very bleak story just as we have come to expect from Lemony Snicket's A Series of Unfortunate Events, the deliciously morbid set of books t...

NOW A NETFLIX ORIGINAL SERIESLike an off-key violin concert, the Roman Empire, or food poisoning, all things must come to an end. Thankfully, this includes A Series of Unfortunate Events by Lemony Snicket. The thirteenth and final installment in the groundbreaking series will answer readers' most burning questions: Will Count Olaf prevail? Will the Baudelaires survive? Will the series end happily? If there's nothing out there, what was that noise?Then again, why trouble you...

NOW A NETFLIX ORIGINAL SERIESDear Reader,You have undoubtedly picked up this book by mistake, so please put it down. Nobody in their right mind would read this particular book about the lives of Violet, Klaus, and Sunny Baudelaire on purpose, because each dismal moment of their stay in the village of V.F.D. has been faithfully and dreadfully recorded in these pages.I can think of no single reason why anyone would want to open a book containing such ...

NOW A NETFLIX ORIGINAL SERIESEverybody loves a carnival! Who can fail to delight in the colourful people, the unworldly spectacle, the fabulous freaks?A carnival is a place for good family fun—as long as one has a family, that is. For the Baudelaire orphans, their time at the carnival turns out to be yet another episode in a now unbearable series of unfortunate events. In fact, in this appalling ninth installment in Lemony Snicket's serial, the siblings mus...

NOW A NETFLIX ORIGINAL SERIESLike bad smells, uninvited weekend guests or very old eggs, there are some things that ought to be avoided.Snicket's saga about the charming, intelligent, and grossly unlucky Baudelaire orphans continues to alarm its distressed and suspicious fans the world over. The tenth book in this outrageous publishing effort features more than the usual dose of distressing details, such as snow gnats, an organised troupe of youngsters, an ...

NOW A NETFLIX ORIGINAL SERIESDear Reader,If you have not read anything about the Baudelaire orphans, then before you read even one more sentence, you should know this: Violet, Klaus, and Sunny are kindhearted and quick-witted, but their lives, in this tale of dark humor and woe, I am sorry to say, are filled with bad luck and misery. All of the stories about these three children are unhappy and wretched, and this one may be the worst of them all.If you haven't got the stoma...

NOW A NETFLIX ORIGINAL SERIESWarning: Your day will become very dark—and possibly damp—if you read this book.Plan to spend this spring in hiding. Lemony Snicket is back with the eleventh book in his New York Times bestselling A Series of Unfortunate Events.Lemony Snicket's saga about the charming, intelligent and grossly unlucky Baudelaire orphans continues to provoke suspicion and despair in readers the world over. In the eleventh and most alarming...

NOW A NETFLIX ORIGINAL SERIESIn their most daring misadventure, the Baudelaire orphans are adopted by very, very rich people, whose penthouse apartment is located mysteriously close to the place where all their misfortune began. Even though their new home in the city is fancy, and the children are clever and charming, I'm sorry to say that still, the unlucky orphans will encounter more disaster and woe.In fact, in this sixth book in A Series of Unfortunate ...

NOW A NETFLIX ORIGINAL SERIESThe Baudelaires need a safe place to stay—somewhere far away from terrible villains and local police. A quiet refuge where misfortune never visits. Might Heimlich Hospital be just the place?In Lemony Snicket's eighth ghastly installment in A Series of Unfortunate Events, I'm sorry to say that the Baudelaire orphans will spend time in a hospital where they risk encountering a misleading newspaper headline, unnecessary surgery, an...