Did you bring the salt?A creaky old robot shows up in a backward, medieval kingdom, promptly triggering all-out war. It's elves versus humans, humans versus dwarves, and pretty much everyone versus the goblins.Now the rusty robot is being pulled from all sides by competing kingdoms. They each want a piece of him... literally.At least there are no dragons to worry about, because they've been boned, filleted and barbecued to the brink of extinction. H...

Do any of these sound familiar?• You want to write your first novel, but you don't know how to begin.• You've started writing several novels, but you never finish them.• You've written a novel or two, but you want to increase your output and publish more often.If you answered yes to any of the above, this book might just be what you're looking for!I'm Simon Haynes, and I've been writing and publishing novels and short fictio...

Three complete novels. One bonus short story. Infinite cosmic chaos.If you love absurd, witty sci-fi, strap in for Hal Spacejock Omnibus Two (Books 4–6 plus bonus content). Join bumbling freighter pilot Hal Spacejock and his long-suffering robotic companion, Clunk, as they navigate dodgy contracts, lethal rivalries, and catastrophic bad luck across the galaxy.What’s Inside the Bundle:Book 4: No Free Lunch

What happens when you're worth more dead than alive?Lim Willet was a decorated fighter pilot, and his death inspired thousands of recruits to join the war against the Mayestrans.Sam Willet is one of those recruits. She's also his sister, and she's noticed that something doesn't add up.When Sam starts asking questions, she discovers someone has gone to extraordinary lengths to bury the truth. Soon she’s caught up in a desperate mission behind enemy l...

Impending eviction. Zero job prospects. One massive police robot.When Harriet Walsh accepted a job off the back of a fast-food flyer, she expected low pay and boring paperwork. She didn't expect an overzealous military-grade robot running precinct logistics—or a massive station debt built on non-existent raffle tickets.Joined by a teenage pickpocket and an opinionated AI patrol car with a passion for the beach, Harriet has to figure out how to do real polic...

A well-meaning young bookkeeper is recruited into a bizarre family business hunting spirits, only to find himself caught between supernatural dangers, a deadly conspiracy, and two people he desperately wants to protect.It's the year 1871, and an unlikely trio patrol the foggy, gaslit streets of London.The Professor: A brilliant, eccentric inventor who can unleash supernatural forces in pursuit of a breakthrough, then compla...

Clunk, an elderly robot, has reached the end of his useful life. He has one last chance to earn a much-needed overhaul.Hal Spacejock, a crash-prone pilot, will have multiple bones rearranged if he doesn't repay a loan shark.Clunk is patient, reasonable and brimming with helpful suggestions.Hal is stubborn, quick to anger and incapable of listening to good advice.They're as compatible as a burning match and a stick of dynamit...

Over 800 pages of laugh-out-loud sci-fi adventure!Hal Spacejock is an obstinate, over-confident, and woefully under-skilled cargo pilot. Clunk is a clapped-out, long-suffering robot who just wants to survive his next assignment. Together, they are the galaxy's most disastrous duo.This value-packed box set includes three full-length novels plus a bonus short story:Book 1: A Robot Named Clunk...

Hal Junior lives aboard a space station, where his teacher is a robot with literal eyes in the back of its head--and with Hal around, it needs them!Today is extra special: a supply ship has arrived, and Hal's class is heading aboard for a tour. But when Hal stumbles across a dangerous secret, his robot teacher mysteriously vanishes.With no one willing to listen to a notorious prankster, its up to Hal to expose the conspiracy and stop a disaster before it's ...

Who thought it was a good idea to let Hal Spacejock inspire the next generation of spacefarers?Clunk has arranged a school visit, and Hal only agrees after he learns about the free lunch.All he has to do is give a speech, hand out a few gifts and admire a project the students have been working on.Simple.Unfortunately, Hal's speech has been neutered, his gifts are about as welcome as detention, and the 'student project' involves strapping the...

Robots took all the good jobs. Hal got stuck with the worst.Working as a cargo loader at a second-rate spaceport on a third-rate planet isn't Hal Spacejock's idea of a glittering career. He doesn't want to haul crates. He wants to explore the galaxy in his very own freighter!Unfortunately, Hal is broke, behind on rent, and one mistake away from being replaced by a cheap, efficient robot.Escaping this miserable life seems impossible, until Hal stumbl...

Three full-length novels in one hilarious volume!"An insane, inspired blend of high fantasy and low humour."A Portion of Dragon and ChipsWhen a mild-mannered, old robot gets stranded in a medieval kingdom, things immediately go downhill. Trapped without a battery recharge, he must dodge a homicidal knight, a greedy queen, and a conniving spymaster—all desperate to exploit or destroy the mechanical marvel.A B...