So, you’ve been ripped out from your mother’s paws and taken in by a strange family of humans that has kids who insist on flapping your floppy ears and dressing you up like a ladybug. These new human-folk are trying to “teach” you things, like sitting or not ripping apart their fun-looking shoes, and you might start to think you should try to “obey.” But I know better; I’ve been around the block and peed on most parts of it. Puppies like you need my—wait, somebody just walked in with a ham...

We all know how our government is fighting global terrorism, but what are you doing to help? Probably not much.The Ultimate Counterterrorist Home Companion can change that. It’s the definitive guide to how you can be a soldier in the War on Terrorism without having to leave your kitchen. This illustrated manual will expertly train you and your entire family in: Spying on your neighbors Turning common household objects into useful terror-fighting weapons

The Bad Driver’s Handbook: Hundreds of Simple Maneuvers to Frustrate, Annoy, and Endanger Those Around You debunks the myths of the good” and bad” driver by describing in detail the liberating truths about driving that have long been suppressed. Novice and experienced drivers-along with those who are bewildered by the utopian fantasies about driving found in the typical DMV handbook-will find all of their questions answered by authors Larry and Zack Arnstein, who offer comical commentary...

Humans have a purpose in this world: providing high-quality cat food, both wet and dry, also the Minimum Daily Cat Requirement of petting(not less than two hours),and most important, making available a good Sleep Environment for a cat. This must include comfortable chairs, couches, beds, countertops and a variety of floor surfaces: bare wood, a cool cement area, linoleum, and carpeting. Carpeting is required not only as an Essential Sleep Option, but also for puking on. Never puke on anyth...

When Wisconsin veterinarian Doc dies, his family learns that to inherit his fortune, they must decipher the cryptic codicil he added to his will---"Take Doofus squirrel-fishing." And they can only do that by talking to Doc's friends, reading the memoir Doc wrote of a Christmas season decades earlier, searching through Doc's correspondence, and discovering clues around them.Humor abounds as this mismatched lot tries to find time in their hectic lives to work together to solve the pu...

Ten hilarious short stories for anyone who hates the holidays!The holiday season is one of laughter, fun, generosity, and time with friends and family . . . or so it’s supposed to be. But we all know that the holiday season can actually be absolutely depressing, no matter how hard we try. So from the wit of humorist Alex Bernstein comes this “miserable” collection of short stories based around Christmas and Hanukkah. Included are short stories, such as:

"This book has everything that makes it a good cozy. Light romance, devoted dog person, curious protagonist, and a mystery."When Maggie May Carver moved to Baker Valley, Colorado she wanted two things: to open a dog barkery with her best friend, and to take care of her aging grandpa.But when her grandpa is accused of murder--a crime he may well have committed--Maggie finds herself in the role of amateur detective.With her faithful Newfie, M...

Something different! Short stories that surprise, pique and intrigue.This companion volume to Me-Time Tales: tea breaks for mature women and curious men-- now allows the men to have their say...only not completely without interruption from mature women.A collection of unusual short stories that delve into the minds of a variety of curious men: hooked on meteorites, tractor parts, foreign parts, own parts— stories that may be sober, sad, bizarre or cunningly funny. ...

Funny Short Stories for Heart-Breakers, the Broken-Hearted and the Completely Utterly ConfusedWhether you’re headed to that exciting first date where you’ll inevitably spill Cabernet all over yourself or you and your significant other are celebrating Date Night #4,081 with an extra pint of Halo Top, everyone can agree on one thing: Love Stinks. How to escape the endless cycle of melancholy? Well, you probably can’t. What you can do is take comfort in humorist Alex ...

Discover the Surprising History of Ordinary Things"Emily magically weaves a vibrant history of simple everyday objects we often take for granted. The Story Behind will surprise and delight..." ─Deana Marie, Creator & Host of the Twisted Philly podcast#1 Best Seller in Trivia & Fun Facts, Art History, Design History & Criticism, Reference, Decorative Arts & Design, and History of Technology

Welcome to Batch Magna, a place where anything might happen. And often does...When Sir Humphrey Strange, 8th Baronet and squire of Batch Magna, departs this world for the Upper House, what’s left of his estate passes, through the ancient law of entailment, to distant relative Humph, an amiable, overweight short-order cook from the Bronx.Sir Humphrey Franklin T. Strange, 9th Baronet and squire of Batch Magna, as Humph now most remarkably finds himself to be, is persuaded b...

Twins growing up together. One is incredibly lucky, the other astonishingly unlucky. One content, the other always striving for more. But will either of them manage to cope with all the obstacles which life throws at them? The Astonishing Anniversaries of James and David is as much a nostalgic romp through 70s, 80s and 90s England as it is a shocking and occasionally tragic comedy."Once I started, I had a hard time stopping"" I enjoyed the story very much, and I ke...