The Bad Driver’s Handbook: Hundreds of Simple Maneuvers to Frustrate, Annoy, and Endanger Those Around You debunks the myths of the good” and bad” driver by describing in detail the liberating truths about driving that have long been suppressed. Novice and experienced drivers-along with those who are bewildered by the utopian fantasies about driving found in the typical DMV handbook-will find all of their questions answered by authors Larry and Zack Arnstein, who offer comical commentary...

So, you’ve been ripped out from your mother’s paws and taken in by a strange family of humans that has kids who insist on flapping your floppy ears and dressing you up like a ladybug. These new human-folk are trying to “teach” you things, like sitting or not ripping apart their fun-looking shoes, and you might start to think you should try to “obey.” But I know better; I’ve been around the block and peed on most parts of it. Puppies like you need my—wait, somebody just walked in with a ham...

We all know how our government is fighting global terrorism, but what are you doing to help? Probably not much.The Ultimate Counterterrorist Home Companion can change that. It’s the definitive guide to how you can be a soldier in the War on Terrorism without having to leave your kitchen. This illustrated manual will expertly train you and your entire family in: Spying on your neighbors Turning common household objects into useful terror-fighting weapons

Humans have a purpose in this world: providing high-quality cat food, both wet and dry, also the Minimum Daily Cat Requirement of petting(not less than two hours),and most important, making available a good Sleep Environment for a cat. This must include comfortable chairs, couches, beds, countertops and a variety of floor surfaces: bare wood, a cool cement area, linoleum, and carpeting. Carpeting is required not only as an Essential Sleep Option, but also for puking on. Never puke on anyth...

Ten hilarious short stories for anyone who hates the holidays!The holiday season is one of laughter, fun, generosity, and time with friends and family . . . or so it’s supposed to be. But we all know that the holiday season can actually be absolutely depressing, no matter how hard we try. So from the wit of humorist Alex Bernstein comes this “miserable” collection of short stories based around Christmas and Hanukkah. Included are short stories, such as:

Discover the Surprising History of Ordinary Things"Emily magically weaves a vibrant history of simple everyday objects we often take for granted. The Story Behind will surprise and delight..." ─Deana Marie, Creator & Host of the Twisted Philly podcast#1 Best Seller in Trivia & Fun Facts, Art History, Design History & Criticism, Reference, Decorative Arts & Design, and History of Technology

Something different! Short stories that surprise, pique and intrigue.This companion volume to Me-Time Tales: tea breaks for mature women and curious men-- now allows the men to have their say...only not completely without interruption from mature women.A collection of unusual short stories that delve into the minds of a variety of curious men: hooked on meteorites, tractor parts, foreign parts, own parts— stories that may be sober, sad, bizarre or cunningly funny. ...

Funny Short Stories for Heart-Breakers, the Broken-Hearted and the Completely Utterly ConfusedWhether you’re headed to that exciting first date where you’ll inevitably spill Cabernet all over yourself or you and your significant other are celebrating Date Night #4,081 with an extra pint of Halo Top, everyone can agree on one thing: Love Stinks. How to escape the endless cycle of melancholy? Well, you probably can’t. What you can do is take comfort in humorist Alex ...

"A lighthearted history of lying"—from the international bestselling author of Humans: A Brief History of How We F*cked It All Up (Kirkus Reviews).We live in a "post-truth" world, we're told. But was there ever really a golden age of truth-telling? Or have people been lying, fibbing and just plain bullsh*tting since the beginning of time?Tom Phillips, editor of a leading independent fact-checking organization, deals with this question every day. In

A Tongue-in-Cheek Guide to Becoming a Dictator, Based on the Outrageous, Scandalous, and Excessive Behavior of Dictators Past and PresentWho hasn’t dreamed of one day ruling your own country? Along with great power comes unlimited influence, control, admiration, and often wealth. How to Be a Dictator will teach you the tricks of the trade-how to rise to the top and stay in power, and how to enjoy the fruits of your excellence.Featuring examples fro...

The ultimate guide to streamlining your life.Life moves too quickly these days, as technology, work, and personal commitments make it almost impossible to relax and enjoy life. Finding yourself stressed over the clutter in your kitchen or the mass of paper in front of your computer? Relax. This book will help. Filled with tips on how to uncomplicate your daily routine, eliminate stress at home and work, and more, this book will help you free up your time so you can...

The bestselling book on the art of the insult is back and it’s more blasphemous than ever. Author and snark connoisseur Lawrence Dorfman does his absolute worst, dishing out hundreds of clever insults for all situations and occasions. From careful instructions on how and when to throw a verbal punch to an expertly curated collection of the best insults in history, this uproarious little book has everything you need to become the ultimate slanderer. Every page is packed with delightfully me...